i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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