Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Randomize
