she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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