this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
