There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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