Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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