so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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