butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
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