the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
