is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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