For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
