Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize