it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize