3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
kristin has been a bad kristin
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Dicks are not precious.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
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