just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize