We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize