I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Randomize
