Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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