when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
3pm strippers are depressing
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
