i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
You're earring is so big in my mouth
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize