I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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