why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Randomize
