where am i from again
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Randomize
