Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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