dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
