The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I'm too high and old for this...
Randomize
