There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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