dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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