After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
