Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize