im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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