Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
