you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
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