we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
