Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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