so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
