Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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