He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
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