you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize