we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
