I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
