i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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