i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
