Porn is love you can see.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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