he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
