Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
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