I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
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