brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
