Plan B is the new Plan A
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
