That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
