singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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