Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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